Leaving Alexandria: A Memoir of Faith and Doubt

Leaving Alexandria: A Memoir of Faith and Doubt

Sometimes you read a book and know it will make a deep and lasting impact on you. This will be one of them.

We all wrestle with trying to understand why we are here and whether or not there is purpose and meaning in our lives. Some are able to accept a religious faith and find it satisfies a spiritual quest for meaning, whereas others never rest easy in that bed, like me.

Richard Holloway's book walks us through his many years in high church office (finally as Bishop of Edinburgh and Primate of the Scottish Episcopal Church) to an eventual resting place where religion is cast aside and an honest acceptance of man's plight reached, although he remains agnostic about God and life after death. Here we see a deeply religious man even when religion is cast aside. There IS depth in humanity and an enduring mystery, but religion is not the answer.

I was moved to tears in the epilogue: this was his life laid bare, a struggle shared with us in the book, and all the more wonderful for it.

Dropbox registry issue - any fixes?

Anyone here know how to PROPERLY fix a Dropbox error with message "unable to access vital account information" Windows registry error?

I have tried ver 1.1.45.exe and that worked for 10 minutes OK then the message reappeared. Uploaded 1.2.45.exe and that was worse. The Dropbox forums are full of people with the same issue. In the past 3 months I've deleted registry data, uninstalled and reinstalled umpteen versions and STILL it doesn't want to work on this WinXP SP2 PC.

Plastic boxes, containers and takeaway shops

Here in Cambridgeshire, some areas collect plastic waste of all kinds at the doorstep and recycle it. Not in Burwell! All we can do is recycle plastic bottles in the village (not from home) and take hard plastics and plastic boxes, such as those supermarket food packages, 20+ miles there and back to our main recycling centre near Cambridge. I actually WANT to do my bit and help the environment but I am not helped by being excluded from a doorstep plastics recycling service - this stopped about 2 years ago, can you believe it?

Another issue: why do supermarkets like Waitrose and Tesco insist in packaging vegetables and fruit in plastic boxes at all? Why not always loose pack or pack in biodegradable packs? Also, why do there have to be so many shapes and sizes? Why not standard size containers that can be stacked in a bin to save space?

Recycling is STILL a total mess in the UK and needs seriously sorting by our governments. All seem to be as incompetent as eachother.

Finally in my rant today, most rubbish at roadsides is from takeaway food places: food containers, plastic drinking cups and metal drinks cans. Just take a look. Why not get fast food outlets like MacDonalds and Kentucky Fried Chicken to pay to pick up their ignorant customers' messes? They'd soon get the message that too much packaging costs them profits.

Encyclopaedia Britannica ends printed version

After 244 years, Encyclopaedia Britannica is stopping publication of its paper versions. See http://mediadecoder.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/03/13/after-244-years-encyclopaedia-britannica-stops-the-presses/ . This is not surprising in the age of Wikipedia and so many online resources, but it was a wonderful resource in its day.....as long as you had strong shelves!

Blackcaps here

This morning we had a blackcap on our bird table. This is a largely migratory bird and I suspect this one had just arrived in from further south in Europe or Africa and was hungry.  It's the first time I recall one actually eating from the bird table. Summer bird visitors are starting to arrive now with the first barn swallows likely to be seen in southern England in the next few weeks. It is around mid April before they appear in any numbers in East Anglia. When the swifts arrive and scream through the evening sky you know summer is really here but that is a couple of months away.

Gay Marriage and the RC church

As a heterosexual male, happily married for over 40 years, I may not be best placed to give a view on gay marriage laws. However, I am absolutely incensed when I hear the Roman Catholic church pontificating about how wrong it is for two people in love to make a public commitment of their love by marriage. What right have they to be so "high and mighty" when their record on sexual morality (child sex abuse, priests who are celibate and know little of sex and its value in a loving relationship, etc)  is, frankly appalling!

Web robot words

As a typical grumpy old man I get fed up with being asked to prove I'm not a robot by entring two words that I can hardly read on the screen. This way of checking for humans seems to have become a lot more common in the last 12 months. Isn't there a better way?

The scale of time

A few days back I mentioned this link which demonstrated the physical scale of things in the universe from the very very tiny to the huge on a cosmological scale. Se http://images.4channel.org/f/src /589217_scale_of_universe_enhanced.swf .

Now this got me wondering about the real nature of time. We think of time as running at a constant rate, although relativity suggests this is not true. We happen to be human beings on a certain physical size scale and to us time goes, more or less, at the speed we are used to. What if time itself was somehow as strange as the physical scale of the universe and ran at rates so divergent that a second of our time was almost an infinity for some things in the multiverses? That our concept of time could be akin to the flat-earther's incomplete view of a multi-dimensional world?

What I'm saying is our concept of physical size and time flow is just how it is for us. One can imagine other universes where time runs incredibly fast or incredibly slowly. Is it really so odd to think that we are just a sub-atomic particle in another universe, or that other entire universes both in all space and time are contained within each sub-atomic particle that makes us and every other bit of star dust?

I'm finding it hard to put into words the sort of concepts going through my head, but in summary I think the whole nature of space and time is far more of a wonder and a mystery than we think or can ever imagine.

Spring has arrived

Feb 26th 2012 and it now feels as if spring has arrived already. After a week or so of very cold snowy days we have the garden springing back to life with bulbs pushing through, the birds singing and looking at nest sites and the grass growing. This morning I even cut my front lawn for the first time this year - just a trim to even out the growth.  March 1st marks the first official day of spring according to the Met Office, so not long now.

Family history

Many years ago my brother, my father and I set out to research our Lapthorn family history in South Devon. In those days there was no Internet so the research was done by looking through transcripts of parish records and reading gravestones. We managed to get right back to the mid 1500s and even found some other, unconnected, records in the same parishes back to 1428. Luckily our family stayed within an area of around ten miles although back in the 1700s some moved to the Southampton area and established a successful sail making business (Ratsey and Lapthorn) who made some sails for very famous yachts.

At the moment my wife is doing the same sort of research using on-line resources and is already back to 1686. We've found out some branches of her family come from nearby Norfolk where her ancestors were farm labourers before they moved to the industrial north when work on the land was hard and the agricultural  depression was at its height. So, today we took a trip to some of the places in Norfolk where her ancestors hailed from.  We saw and touched the very font in which our grandson's great, great, great, great, great grandfather was christened in a lonely Norfolk church way back in 1797. My wife was visibly moved to "connect" to her forefathers in this way.

Isn't it amazing to think that each and every one of us is here because of a series of encounters stretching back to the beginning of time. If just one of these encounters had not occurred then each one of us would not be here. Our very existence is precious and truly wonderful.

Litter - we are a MESSY country

From http://www.telegraph.co.uk/

There is no getting away from it, England has become a messy, untidy, litter ridden place. I remember being appalled at the plastic bottles that were strewn about the roadsides and olive groves in mainland Greece some years ago, but England is not too far behind now. Why?

Visit New Zealand, Iceland, France and Sweden and there is hardly any litter in rural areas. France used to be different, but they have become a nation with pride in their countryside and I was amazed how clean and tidy the country looked last year. If they can do it why can't the UK?

What has changed in the UK? Why are we now so prepared to accept a scruffy and litter ridden roadside? Most of it is takeaway rubbish: cans, food packaging, etc which is thrown out of windows by idiots who could not care less. It saddens me that these people, lots of them, do not care. Do they like living in a rubbish dump?  Have we no pride any more?

What is the solution? Education? Punishment?

Although in my political views I am a liberal at heart, I find myself thinking that, rather than dole out benefits to those unable (or unwilling) to find a job, people should be required to undertake something useful to earn the benefit. Seeing how bad our roadsides have become, why not ask people to spend a few hours a week with a yellow jacket on picking up some of this detritus? Oh, of course not, that would be a "health and safety" risk! As so much of the rubbish originates in takeaway food shops why not put a tax on takeaways that are packaged in non biodegradable materials? Or maybe make local takeaway establishments responsible for roadside "scattered" litter collection locally?

The scale of things

http://images.4channel.org/f/src/589217_scale_of_universe_enhanced.swf

This quite wonderful website brings to life the scale of things in our incredible universe from the smallest strings and branes to the largest galaxies and nebulae in the cosmos. And we are somewhere in the middle of all this.  Zoom in both directions (smaller and larger) and be amazed.

Winter Sun

It has been a glorious day here in Cambridgeshire. We've now had snow for about a week and after the fresh falls on Thursday night and overnight temperatures between -10 and -14 deg C it is crisp, powdery and white.  It looks like this will last a couple more days before the thaw sets in.

Saying farewells

When we die is that it?

My old work colleague who had prostate cancer lost his battle last week. I 'd been able to visit him a couple of times recently, the last time being just a couple of days before he died. Today I went to his funeral which included a very Catholic requiem mass with lots of incense, prayers and a communion.  Now John had a very strong faith that helped him cope with his coming end. He said many times that he did not worry about dying. 

Clearly if you have a strong faith, and sincerely believe it, then a funeral is more of a celebration for a life not ended and just moving on to its next, and eternal, stage. If you have no faith, or a weak one, then a Christian funeral service can be a difficult thing to understand or feel part of. That was how I felt today: I just didn't connect with it. It didn't ring true to me.

One of the most meaningful funerals I have ever been to was for my ex-girlfriend's dad. It was a simple humanist service with one of the family members talking about dad with affection and fond memories. Their dad had lived a generally good and fulfilling life but now it had ended. There was no hope for a resurrection, to an eternal life, no fear of a hell, no wish for sins to be forgiven, just quiet thanks for the life that had come to its end. Somehow this felt right and how it should be if we are mature human beings.

And yet, something nags away at me: why does the universe have such complexity, why does it exist at all, why do love and human kindness feel so much more significant than just biological imperatives for the survival of our genes? To use a biblical phrase, "we see as in a glass dimly". Our human brains cannot comprehend the complexities that are the wonders of the universe. Maybe we just have to accept that we do not, and cannot, know if there is more to life than our three score years and ten, if we are lucky.

An agnostic I remain....

Mid-winter Snow

For the first time this year we have had some snow here in Burwell, and quite a decent amount for around here. I estimate 100mm (4 inches) has fallen overnight. In this part of the UK we have few hills, so when the snow comes, and it rarely lasts long, children head for the local meadow with their rarely used sledges and enjoy the fun on the few slopes we have. Our road is usually very quiet, but this morning it was busy with mums, dads and children dragging their sledges.

The film "War Horse"

My wife and I went to see the film "War Horse" this afternoon. A reasonable yarn, but several things annoyed me. Why do film producers (and the BBC for that matter) choose such strange "local" accents for people supposed to come from Devon? Why were there lots of conifer plantations on Dartmoor in a film set before/during WW1? Why was the Devon village made of Cotswold stone? Why do we have to have "American deep" music to portray pathos? Why did I keep thinking about all the CGI effects? Why did Spielberg bother? Why did we bother?

Chirp birdsong app for iPhone

My grandson very much enjoys the Chirp app for the iPhone and iPod Touch. Using it, one can learn about the bird songs of a great number of birds you're likely to find in your country. The app allows you to play song samples for each bird or you can take a series of graded quizzes to test how well you know the bird songs. My grandson is better at it than me! I can recommend this if you enjoy birds. The app was just £1.99 in the UK and well worth it.

Late winter evenings

At long last the nights are getting darker later: here near Cambridge it is still light at around 5pm now. As the rate of change speeds up through February, it will soon be light until 6pm.

I quite enjoy this time of the year as it  is full of promise and hope. The garden daffodils and crocus are pushing through and the birds in the garden are starting to explore the nestboxes again in readiness for spring and young.  For many years we have had blue tits and great tits in our nest boxes and I hope they will nest again, especially as the nestboxes have been repaired and made ready for the guests.

Garden Birdwatch 2012

Every year for many years now I've taken part in the RSPB's Garden Birdwatch. You are asked to count the maximum number of each different bird species seen in your garden, or in a park,  in any one hour.  My house backs on to a lane and then open meadows with a good number of deciduous trees so I usually manage to see an interesting variety of the smaller birds. Last year the long-tailed tit (see left) was the big surprise with no less than 12 seen together. Occasionally we get a treat when a sparrow hawk, green woodpecker or spotted woodpecker appear, but so far never in the hour I am doing the count. Anyone can take part for any hour over this weekend and you do not have to be a Royal Society for the Protection of Birds member.

UK tax inefficiency

Why do we still have TV licences? Why not just increase income tax or increase VAT on TVs, PCs, mobiles and phones and save all that admin cost? Same applies to road fund tax: why not just put up fuel duty? Again, less admin, no evasion.   Likewise the winter fuel payment for all people over 60 in the UK: the taxman knows how old each of us is, so why not just increase the tax free allowance on income tax if you are over 60?

And all shall be well

This afternoon I visited a colleague of mine known for over 40 years. We go back a long time.  Today John lies in a hospice bed in Cambridge, his life hanging on a thread, his body racked with pain from prostate cancer that has spread to his bones and vital organs. He is now on a continuous drip that helps to reduce his pain. His wife is the model of calm as she sits at his bedside, knowing that his life on planet Earth has just a few days or weeks to run.  We talk about "the old days". We mention a few names. We talk about trivial things. He slips into light sleep then wakes again. He is in pain.

And yet he is calm and ready.  John, his wife and their family have a strong faith and believe that he is being held and loved by a far greater power and love. He says calmly in a quiet voice, "I'll go when the Lord calls me".  His faith is utterly grounded and sure, with not a shadow of doubt. Oh to have such a strong faith, a belief that this is not the end, just part of our journey. 

Which brings me to the closing lines of T.S.Eliot's "Dry Salvages" from his Four Quartets:

"With the drawing of this Love and the voice of this Calling
We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time. 

Through the unknown, unremembered gate
When the last of earth left to discover
Is that which was the beginning;
At the source of the longest river
The voice of the hidden waterfall
And the children in the apple-tree
Not known, because not looked for
But heard, half-heard, in the stillness
Between two waves of the sea.

Quick now, here, now, always —
A condition of complete simplicity
(Costing not less than everything)
And all shall be well and
All manner of thing shall be well
When the tongues of flames are in-folded
Into the crowned knot of fire
And the fire and the rose are one."

And all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well.

Wikipedia blackout

For 24 hours Wikipedia is going "off air" in protest at possible US legislation that could radically affect the Internet as we know it. The Internet works because it is free, open and uncensored. This is the way it should remain, even if this sometimes means we can be offended or hurt by what we see or hear. We are adults and can make up our own minds. There are ways to safeguard children which any responsible parent can implement.

This appears on the Wikipedia main page:

"For over a decade, we have spent millions of hours building the largest encyclopedia in human history. Right now, the U.S. Congress is considering legislation that could fatally damage the free and open Internet. For 24 hours, to raise awareness, we are blacking out Wikipedia. Learn more."

"Shame" Movie

This afternoon my wife and I went to the cinema in Cambridge to watch a new film called "Shame" starring Michael Fassbender and Carey Mulligan. The film is a UK Film 4 production, but it is set in New York and tells the story of a man, played by Fassbender, who is addicted to sex.  Although there is indeed a LOT of sex in the film it is, in truth, a story about loss, loneliness, isolation and sadness. Many will find it bleak and totally miserable. This is an "art house" genre film and there is no way you will find the sex scenes turn you on: the sex is empty and loveless. If you enjoy films, especially ones that challenge, then you may find this one worth watching.  There is a trailer at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi404332057/

The present

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a present. Enjoy it.

CERN, particles and cosmology

As you may know scientists at the Large Hadron Collider at CERN in Switzerland are currently searching for some mysterious elemental particles.  At the same time cosmologists are struggling to make sense of the universe (or is it universes?) debating whether space is expanding, contracting, static or made of strings.  They debate how many dimensions they need to make the theories work. The search for a grand unified theory bringing together the subatomic and cosmological scales continues.

Now here's a thought: are we looking in completely the wrong places? Is it conceivable that within each atom there exists an entire universe? And within each atom within this universe there are yet more universes, and so on for ever? In the opposite direction (outwards) are we just part of the space dust that makes our universe a microscopic part of something yet larger, and so on for ever? And do these diverging scales somehow fold back into a unified whole?

I am neither a cosmologist nor a particle physicist and my knowledge of quantum mechanics was limited to some difficult lectures in my last year at university in 1970, but I do remember the sense of awe and wonder when told that everything could be viewed as a wave function existing in all space and all time: somehow we are already everywhere (statistically) and we exist in all time forwards into the future and backwards into the past (statistically). What I am speculating is that the macro and the micro world could be one and the same.

In God We Doubt - a book I've just read and recommend

In God We Doubt: Confessions of a Failed Atheist is a book by the BBC Radio 4 Today presenter John Humphrys in which he explores why people do, or do not, believe in God. As an agnostic myself, full of doubt and confused about what to believe, I found this a very honest and open book that asks the right questions, although I am still little further forward on my spiritual journey.

This is the description from Amazon:

"Throughout the ages believers have been persecuted – usually for believing in the “wrong” God. So have non-believers who have denied the existence of God as superstitious rubbish.

Today it is the agnostics who are given a hard time. They are scorned by believers for their failure to find faith and by atheists for being hopelessly wishy-washy and weak-minded. But John Humphrys is proud to count himself among their ranks. In this book he takes us along the spiritual road he himself has travelled. He was brought up a Christian and prayed every day of his life until his growing doubts finally began to overwhelm his faith.

As one of the nation’s most popular and respected broadcasters, he had the rare opportunity in 2006 of challenging leaders of our three main religions to prove to him that God does exist. The Radio Four interviews – Humphrys In Search of God – provoked the biggest response to anything he has done in half a century of journalism. The interviews and the massive reaction from listeners had a profound effect on him – but not in the way he expected.

Doubt is not the easy option. But for the millions who can find no easy answers to the most profound questions it is the only possible one."

"The English" by Jeremy Paxman

Although this book is now 12 years old I've only just read it having seen a copy on my son's bookshelf recently. It was a thoroughly enjoyable read. Let me quote from the Amazon description of The English:

"What is it about the English? Not the British overall, not the Scots, not the Irish or Welsh, but the English. Why do they seem so unsure of who they are? As Jeremy Paxman remarks in his preface to The English, being English "used to be so easy". Now, with the Empire gone, with Wales and Scotland moving into more independent postures, with the troubling spectre of a united Europe (and despite the raucous hype of "Cool Britannia"), the English seem to have entered a collective crisis of national identity."

Whether you celebrate Christmas as a Christian or simply as a time in mid-winter when you can enjoy some good food and family company, I hope Dec 25th is a very happy time for you.

What happened in the Middle East over 2000 years ago this Christmas may never be properly known, but just perhaps something extraordinary did happen back then. The stories about it have passed down over the centuries. They may be inaccurate, mixed up, partly myth, or totally wrong. Somehow though I have a deep sense that in this muddled, often contradictory, set of accounts there is something timeless and important we need to respond to. 

And here is the famous poem by John Betjeman that senses this. In the midst of the humdrum activities of Christmas - the presents and the food and the decorations - there is that mystery. What really happened? What is the message?

Christmas

The bells of waiting Advent ring,
The Tortoise stove is lit again
And lamp-oil light across the night
Has caught the streaks of winter rain.
In many a stained-glass window sheen
From Crimson Lake to Hooker’s Green.

The holly in the windy hedge
And round the Manor House the yew
Will soon be stripped to deck the ledge,
The altar, font and arch and pew,
So that villagers can say
‘The Church looks nice’ on Christmas Day.

Provincial public houses blaze
And Corporation tramcars clang,
On lighted tenements I gaze
Where paper decorations hang,
And bunting in the red Town Hall
Says ‘Merry Christmas to you all’

And London shops on Christmas Eve
Are strung with silver bells and flowers
As hurrying clerks the City leave
To pigeon-haunted classic towers,
And marbled clouds go scudding by
The many-steepled London sky.

And girls in slacks remember Dad,
And oafish louts remember Mum,
And sleepless children’s hearts are glad,
And Christmas morning bells say ‘Come!’
Even to shining ones who dwell
Safe in the Dorchester Hotel.

And is it true? and is it true?
The most tremendous tale of all,
Seen in a stained-glass window’s hue,
A Baby in an ox’s stall?
The Maker of the stars and sea
Become a Child on earth for me?

And is it true? For if it is,
No loving fingers tying strings
Around those tissued fripperies,
The sweet and silly Christmas things,
Bath salts and inexpensive scent
And hideous tie so kindly meant.

No love that in a family dwells,
No carolling in frosty air,
Nor all the steeple-shaking bells
Can with this single Truth compare -
That God was Man in Palestine
And lives to-day in Bread and Wine.

— John Betjeman (1906 - 1984)

Remember Spangles sweets?

If, like me, you were a young child in the 1950s you will remember the sweets called Spangles that came in long rectangular packets containing square shaped hard sweets. They were available in all sorts of flavours. Spangles disappeared from shops years later and I don't think they are available nowadays. To me these are one of the evocative memories of the post war years in England along with sherbert lemon and similar treats.

For a look back at how we were see The 50s and 60s The Best of Times Growing Up and Being Young in Britain which is a nostalgic look back at the things that defined us.

Bara Brith

We were introduced to Bara Brith,  a low fat cake recipe, when in Wales with friends a few years ago. A version made with self-raising flour keeps for a long time. The Welsh recipe soaks dried fruit in tea overnight before baking. It is delicious with a cup of tea or as a slice with a dollop of ice cream after dinner. What is more, being low fat it is quite a healthy cake to enjoy.

Eckhart Tolle

Are you, like me, one of the people who had never heard of Eckhart Tolle? My son told me about him this week. He's a German-born Canadian resident, a philosopher and thinker, and the author of the The Power of Now, a book I'd never heard about. I have watched a few of his YouTube videos and he does talk a lot of sense.  Tolle writes that "the most significant thing that can happen to a human being [is] the separation process of thinking and awareness" and that awareness is "the space in which thoughts exist". He also writes that religions "have become so overlaid with extraneous matter that their spiritual substance has become almost completely obscured"^, that they have become "to a large extent ... divisive rather than unifying forces" and become "themselves part of the insanity".   I am a little uncomfortable about the commercialisation of his work though which rather taints the good sense he talks. Still, there is a lot of free content around which is worth a look. Make up your own mind whether it is helpful or not on your own spiritual journey.

Bathroom spiders and memory

Some people love them and some hate them, but I find spiders fascinating and harmless creatures. About 6 weeks ago I noticed a spider about 5mm across, type unknown but typical type found in UK houses, creating a little nest above our bath. Rather than clear it away I left it and waited to see what happened. About 2 weeks ago the baby spiders started to appear, most often when we were having a bath and the room was warm and steamy. The first time just a couple appeared but within a week or so up to 10 baby spiders no more than 1-2mm across started to appear. This weekend I've noticed they've started to venture a bit further and are now at the other end of the room.

What amazes me about spiders, and indeed all sorts of insects and other wild creatures is the ability to do things by what must be inherited "memory". How does this tiny little spider know how to go hunting? How does it know how to create those incredible webs of silk? How does a late flying young swallow know how to head south across 6000-7000 miles of often hostile desert and oceans to join its parents in South Africa every autumn and then make the same journey back again the following spring?

How we all have evolved is nothing short of incredible. In the case of human beings we have something like 100 billion neurons and countless neural connections. It beggars believe.

Finally, one does wonder about inherited memory. Here I mean not only the sort of thing we'd call "instinct" but is there a possibility we actually can inherit/pass down actual memories (of things, places, events) from our ancestors? The traditional view is no, but sometimes I do wonder.

What does the EU do for Europe?

I heard about yet another case where the bureaucrats in Brussels want to interfere with something which does not need interfering with today. In this case it was to do with amateur radio kits now needing additional tests. The impact of such changes will be to kill the market for these products in Europe. No-one benefits.

The EU as a free trade area without barriers to trade for its members is a perfectly fine thing, but when the bureaucrats and politicians want to go further and impose stupid regulations where none are needed I get frustrated and annoyed.

The problems with the euro today are because some nations either lied or hid the truth about their financial affairs. Living with the consequences will hurt all within the EU, including the UK which does not have the euro.

We would do well to forget federalism, a common currency and the meddling of petty bureaucrats and politicians and just agree that the EU will be again simply a free trade area, still with national identities, currencies and traditions. Light touch bureaucracy works best. 
 
Has Europe become a better, happier place in the last 40-50 odd years as a result of the EU? Unquestionably no.

The Quaker Way?

The traditional view of a supernatural God "out there", beyond and above us, has never truly felt meaningful to me.  Nonetheless, despite reading and largely agreeing with much rational, atheist writing (e.g. that of Richard Dawkins), I am still left with a sense of the holiness, depth, mystery and "connectedness" of all things in the universe, especially of all living things. A purely biological explanation of how we came to be may be correct, but somehow misses something to do with our connectedness, our sense of the "spiritual" depth in our lives, of the fundamental mystery of life, consciousness, and total, unconditional love that appears key to our very existence. Life is not shallow.

The Quakers seem to have the right ideas. Let me quote from the Quaker faith in action webpage:

"Quaker faith springs from a deeply held belief in living our lives according to our spiritual experience. Some of our spiritual insights, which we call our testimonies, spring from deep experience and have been a part of Quaker faith for many years. These Quaker testimonies arise out of an inner conviction and challenge our normal ways of living:

• they exist in spiritually led actions rather than rigid written forms
• they are governed by continuing spiritual experience and are not imposed in any way
• they require us to search for ways in which we can live out the testimonies for ourselves

It’s not easy, but with loving advice and a supportive community, Quakers are encouraged to keep trying.

Truth and integrity
Quakers try to live according to the deepest truth we know, which we believe comes from God. This means speaking the truth to all, including people in positions of power. Integrity is the guiding principle we set for ourselves and expect in public life.

Justice, equality and community
Quakers recognise the equal worth and unique nature of every person. This means working to change the systems that cause injustice and hinder true community. It also means working with people who are suffering from injustice, such as prisoners and asylum seekers.

Simplicity
Quakers are concerned about the excesses and unfairness of our consumer society, and the unsustainable use of natural resources. We try to live simply and to give space for the things that really matter: the people around us, the natural world, our experience of God.

Peace
Perhaps Quakers are best known for our peace testimony. This arises from our conviction that love is at the heart of existence and all human beings are equal in the eyes of God, and that we must live in a way that reflects this. The peace testimony has led Quakers to refuse military service, and to become involved in a wide range of peace activities, from practical work in areas affected by violent conflict to the development of alternatives to violence at all levels from personal to international. Read more about Quakers and peace."

Quakers are well known for their peace and reconciliation work across the world. They were central in bridge-building in N.Ireland. They have always maintained that war is ultimately futile and that there are better ways to solve international problems and disputes.  They have always had a very ethical way of doing business.

Fundamentally, Quakers look for "that of God in everyone". This sounds quaint, but it has deep meaning: in every human we see something of the depth and mystery that is at the core of all life. We are part of a complex interconnected web of life: in the face of every living thing we glimpse the ultimate meaning of life, the ground of all our being. We see what some would call God.